This one's a compilation of snippets of conversation from the North Star Gender Identity email list over the course of the last week or so.
"How does one refer to a gender-neutral person without depersonalizing them? In English "it" implies a non-sentient object, while other languages similarly derived from Latin use gendered pronouns for inanimate objects as well."
The association of "it" with non-human objects is an English (or perhaps even Romance-languages) thing. It's not universal.
I
had a conversation with another staff member at the homeless shelter
that I volunteer at about trans issues, and she had what I found to be a
really valuable insight into this: at the time of the conversation, she
was pregnant and living with the baby's father and another friend who
are both from a culture (I didn't ask which... pacific islander?) where
babies are routinely referred to by gender-neutral pronouns. Because of
their background in another language for which such would be the norm,
both of the men regularly referred to her unborn baby as 'it' without
intending any disrespect to the infant's humanity.
There are gender-neutral pronoun sets out there, but unfortunately there's so many that none has been able to establish itself as the standard. I personally find the zie-series easiest to wrap my head around, but consider the others to be equally valid. That being said, I don't get bent out of shape over being referred to by either of the standard gendered sets... so long as I don't get the impression that it's being done in order to reinforce a "you're a woman, quit playing at being something else" message.
"If you were 'fixed' in the resurrection, what would you prefer to be: male, female, or neuter or eunuch-like?"
I haven't sought inspiration about what sex my resurrected self will
be, but I suspect it would be neuter; that being said, I'm open to
alternatives that God may have in mind since He is much more qualified
to predict which of the available options I would be happy with than I
am.
Stealing Arcee's wonderful wording on how a non-binary person would like to be addressed:
I don't want people to define me by my gender at all, but get to know
me for who I am, not what my body configuration leads you to conclude.
Don't call me Brother, don't call me Sister... please, just call me a
friend.
I think the thing that surprised (and disappointed?) me the most about that whole conversation was how hard it was to convince people that being non-binary was a thing. That the "two trees" analogy meant we had to be one or the other, whether we accepted it or not. That the question of which gender we will have in the resurrection should be so pertinent to how we live our lives now. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteYeah... although I chock it up to the same issue that cis folks have understanding trans folks. How can one really understand something that you've never experienced? You can't.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts exactly.
ReplyDelete